Daycare & Swimming

Well I said I'd follow up with the other 2 topics that were keeping me up Wednesday night so here it goes...

Topic 2 - enrolling Layla part-time vs. full-time in daycare

Like I mentioned previously, we found a daycare that we really like. However, being teachers, there are many days throughout the year that we will not be utilizing their services (not to mention summer). Obviously this lady has her business to run and maintain and she requires payments each week based upon how your child is enrolled. So if we enroll Layla full-time then the 2 weeks of Christmas break and the week of Spring Break we'd be paying for nothing. If we enroll her part-time (3 days/week), we'd only be paying for 3 days of non-use instead of 5. Make sense? And the cost to reserve her spot over the summer for the following year would also be cheaper because it's based on how she was enrolled that fall/spring. So we'd be saving money all around to enroll her only 3 days/week rather than 5.

We asked around our church and found a lady who would watch her on Mondays and Fridays. Perfect! Mondays and Fridays are always the days we have off for holidays during the school year. So we wouldn't be paying the daycare or her on days we would be keeping Layla.

But Wednesday night I started second guessing this decision. It seems to be more of a hassle to have 2 locations for daycare. And after figuring how much we'd be saving, it seems more miniscule than I originally thought. Every penny counts, don't get me wrong! I guess it's more of a convenience thing. There's also the problem that occurs if the lady were to get sick and we couldn't find someone else to watch Layla for the day.

So in the end, I think I'm going to be enrolling Layla full-time and explaining everything to the lady who was planning on watching her.

Topic 3 - Masters Swimming

For those of you who don't know, I was a competitive swimmer for 12 years. I have always loved swimming and believe it to be the best form of excersie. I attempted (pretty miserably) in college to continue swimming on my own. Now 8 years after high school and 1 child later I am in the worst shape of my life! I have found that phrase to be a re-occuring one as the years have gone by. I would hate to see what I look like in another 8 if this keeps up!

But hope is around the corner! When I was roughly 6 months pregnant I came across some information about a Masters Swimming progam with the local swim team. It sounds more elite than it actually is. Basically it's anyone over 18 who wants to swim in an organized fashion (i.e. coach w/ workouts). However, being 6 months pregnant I was NOT fitting into any of my old suits. I emailed the man in charge and told him I was very interested but couldn't quite start at the time.

A few months later my precious Layla was born and I completely forgot about the program. Then one day, a few weeks ago, I received an email asking how my baby was and letting me know that they were still in full swing with the Masters Swimming! I quickly ordered some suits seeing as I only have 2 left from high school. Although I can still fit in them b/c they are beyond worn and used, I would rather start fresh....and I'm done with layering my suits just to practice. Okay, worn and used is a pretty lame way to describe these suits. The elastic is hard and cracking...they are thin and see-through...if you can picture the most pathetic suit you have ever seen just multiply that by 10 and you've got my suits. They were good to me through college...but if I'm going to get serious about swimming again...and be in the presence of a coach...I would like to look a bit more put together :-)

I just became a member of USA Masters and am excited to head to the pool Monday evening to register with the team and get started!

The suits arrived today and I think before I go to bed I'm going to try them on to see how they fit!!

I mentioned in my last blog that this topic ulitmately led back to Topic 1. I figured that I'll be spending roughly 4 hours with Layla a day when I have to go back to work. That will be slightly shortened because of swimming. So that night I was really questioning getting started with it. But after much thought, I decided to go ahead and join. I'll only be swimming 2 times a week. One week night and Saturday morning. I'm sure I'll drag my feet b/c I'll want to be with my sweet Layla...but the long-term benefits of doing this are enormous! She's soon going to be all over the place and I need to build up my stamina so I can play with her...I don't want to be a mom who can't play all day with her child b/c I've been a bum for 4 years! Sheesh...I've had my 2.5 year old nephew for just one day and I'm already worn out!! That's made me question exactly when we want to have our second child...but that's another post. :-)



So there it is...everything that kept me up until 5:30 am Wednesday night/Thursday morning.


*I would appreciate encouragement with this swimming thing. Just keep on me by asking me how it's going. I know the more people who hold me accountable, the more likely I'll be to stick with it.


**On a side note...I have found that I now think about things as topics to blog about instead of just thinking. Something will pop into my head and I'll begin thinking about how it would read in a blog. Does that mean I'm already addicted? I have at least 4 topics on hold already....


***I also promise that not all my posts will be this lengthy!

Can't Sleep

I have decided to join the world of blogging. How appropriate that I start this adventure on a night I can't sleep. It's currently 3:21 and I have slept approximately 40 minutes (give or take a few). I was actually asleep quite nicely until dear Layla woke up screaming for some unknown reason. It took her an hour to fall back asleep. Therefore I had plenty of time to let my mind wander to various subjects which would lead me to the couch at 3:00am unable to sleep.

Topic number 1 - for which I blame entirely for my insomnia - daycare for Layla.

The day is quickly approaching when I will no longer be the person that Layla spends most of her time with. That thought alone sends me to tears. It's one thing to leave her with family (which I'm sure I wouldn't handle tear-free, either), but something entirely different to be leaving her with strangers. We have found a daycare that we really like. It's a bit more than another place we looked at, but it's literally one block away from the school I'll be working at this year. Convenience was a big factor in choosing this particular daycare. They also have an excellent system set up for infants, toddlers, and preschoolers. I really don't know if we could find anything better.

However, that doesn't seem to console me in times such as tonight. I've figured that I'll be spending approximately 4 hours with her a day...pause for crying...factoring in that she really is going to have to begin going to bed earlier. Next week begins our two-week course at creating some sort of schedule before I go back to work on the 18th....more crying...

4 hours a day! The remainder of her waking moments will be with other adults. I know moms all over have had to deal with this...but that doesn't ease my thoughts one bit. Moms have approached me with their stories on going back to work and I just smile and nod, affirming that I understand that it will be hard at first but it's something I'll get used to. And, yes, I probably will get used to it...but that doesn't change the fact that my precious little girl will be seeing someone else's face more than mine....in someone else's arms more than mine...more crying....

Will she crawl at daycare for the first time? Will her first steps be at daycare? What about her first words? If so, I don't want to know. I'm making it a point to let the adults at the daycare know that they are not to tell me if she did any of those things (unless I've already mentioned that she has done them at home). Ignorance will be bliss if it means I can enjoy her firsts at home without having the ugly knowledge that she actually did it somewhere else first and I didn't witness it.

A part of me wishes we would have been a bit wiser in the first year of our marriage with our finances. Did we really need all this furniture? Did we need to trade my old car for a "new" used one with payments?

I also wish we would have been much more focused on our house. I have said from the beginning I didn't want to have kids in this house...obviously that didn't happen. I would like to move before she is extremely mobile...that is more than likely not going to happen, either. If I just wouldn't have become such a lazy bum when I got home would we already be in a different house?

But had we been wiser with our finances...and had we kicked butt on the house....would I be in a position where I could stay home full-time? I will never know. So here comes the part where I tell myself I can't live in "what-ifs". It's something I need to work on.

I guess I just have to hold out hope that sending her to daycare won't be a turn for the worse. I know, I know, kids turn out perfectly fine after being in daycare...I went to daycare. I guess I'm hoping more that it won't be a turn for the worse for me. I'm also holding out hope that after a year of both of us bringing in two full-time incomes once again that we are in a better position for me to stay home...or try for a part-time teaching position...the following year.

Ideally I would love to be a stay-at-home mom until all our kids are in school.

I've been saying that my desire to move currently outweighs my desire to stay home with Layla. However, it's times like tonight that I'm not sure if that is true. Maybe that's what I've convinced myself to be true simply to help me deal with her being in daycare all day.

It's 4:10am and I'm now hungry on top of being wide awake. I think I'll try a cup of warm milk...although it's been long enough now that Layla will surely wake up to eat by the time I fall asleep.

Details on the other topics that have kept me awake will have to wait until the next time I post...but I'll leave you with the topics themselves in case you're interested.

Topic 2 - Enrolling Layla part-time in order to save a few bucks

Topic 3 - Masters Swimming...which ultimately leads back to Topic 1

I'll also post a more recent picture...the one above is a month and a half old.