Uninvited Guest

Over the past couple of hours, I have heard a rustling. Sitting in the living room, it sounded as though it was coming from the kitchen. My heart sank at the first realization that the sound was inconsistent - that it was not just the wild wind we have tonight rustling a plastic bag in the kitchen. No, this was a sound I had heard before. The all-to-familiar sound of a mouse sneaking around in our kitchen! Ugh. I really thought we had ended that battle. I won't even begin to tell you the battles we have fought with those pesky creatures, but the addition of a new back door and a LOT of insta-foam around the house over the past year has seemed to put our battles at end. We had finally won the war!

And then this.

The sound.

I woke Jeremy up (he had fallen asleep on the couch) and told him to listen. Of course it ceased.

A bit later I heard it again.

Again, I told Jeremy to listen. It was quite loud...as loud as a pesky varmint can be. Yet Jeremy heard nothing. I couldn't believe it. I was reminded of the Flinstones episode where Wilma is kept awake due to a drip from a leaky faucet yet Fred hears nothing and continues sleeping peacefully. (I know it exists...but both Google and YouTube searches yielded nothing.)

Finally Jeremy heard it!

But it wasn't coming from the kitchen. It was coming from the hallway.

There was a large tote and a small cardboard box in the hall. We thought perhaps there was a mouse stuck inside trying to get out.

First up was the small box. We placed it inside a trashbag (in case the thing jumped out, of course) and, supplied with tongs and nervous, jumpy hands, we opened the box and began pulling out the contents.

Nothing.

The large tote was next. Now, this had unused Christmas decorations and empty boxes in it and had been closed since putting up the decorations, so there was no logical reason as to why/how a mouse wold have gotten in. But, over the years, we have learned that "logic" and "mouse" are two words that never seem to go together.

We began pulling out the contents.

Nothing.

We concluded that the sucker must be in the air duct and is trying to climb/jump/slide its way out.

Jeremy went to bed and I sat back down on the couch.

There it was again.

I texted Jeremy (because that is what we do while both in the same house) to ask if he heard it in the bedroom. Nope.

I sat and listened. This noise just sounded much bigger than a mouse. And so I texted Jeremy my thoughts. He replied with a simple "hmmm". AKA - I'm trying to sleep, stop worrying about it.

My mind started wandering and it eventually led me to a little mouse finally defeating its Everest and escaping from its dismal abyss...and into the main part of the house! So, naturally, I go in search of an empty tote to place over the vent where it appears to be struggling and a heavy object to place on top of that. I'm taking no chances here!

As I place the tote over the vent, I hear it again! Only it's not coming from below the floor. It's above my head! Or in the walls! Eek! I can't tell, but it's definitely loud and definitely bigger than a mouse!

Of course I go wake up Jeremy and make him stand and listen.

Yep, he agrees.

We come to a theory that the crazy winds have forced open the attic window (this has happened a few times in the past) and something found its way into the warmth (this has never happened in the past). Well...it's not at all warm up there. But it is out of the fierce wind.

We hit the ceiling and hear claws/toenails/who knows scraping across the metal grates of what used to be, I assume, a working attic fan.

A raccoon? A cat? A squirrel?

Jeremy grabs a flashlight, puts on a sweatshirt and shoes, and heads up.

I envision the scene in Elf where Buddy goes in for a hug with a raccoon. Later I learn that Jeremy was picturing National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Either way, both of us are a bit freaked out about what we he will see when opening the attic access.

He gets up there no problem. I hit the metal grates. Scampering ensues. Jeremy sees nothing.

But the attic window is in fact open. After trying to pile a few random objects from the attic in front of it, it is decided...which, as many times as he's had to go up in the past to close it, I'm not sure why we haven't decided this before...we decide to nail it shut.

One final attempt to see the "thing" by throwing a scrap piece of PVC into the darkness of the other half of the attic proved futile. Landing in a sea of insulation without a hint of sound and the black, black emptiness surrounding it gave the sensation that the pipe was still flying or had vanished entirely. I'm sure the "thing" heard nothing. In fact, I know it didn't. Because it did not stir. Or, rather, it did not run across the metal grate of the old attic fan. I guess it could have scampered through the insulation and been just as silent as the PVC pipe. However, I'd rather not think of something sneaking around up there unnoticed while my head is popped up into the attic and Jeremy is a free target.

So we both came down the ladder. Perhaps tomorrow, when the sun is out and the attic is lit, another go will be made at figuring out what has taken up residence in our attic.

Until then, I will try not to stress about it making a home in whatever comfortable tote it can find and ruining the objects within. I will try not to think about the size of the animal...and the size of the stench that will follow once it dies. I will try not think about our little unwanted guest.



**Side note - I'm pretty sure the tense of my verbs has not been consistent when telling this story. However, seeing as it's nearly 1:00am, I am not about to go back and review my work. You'll just have to deal.